Renesmee Cullen
I woke up early, around 7 AM. Jacob was still asleep, snoring loudly. I stepped out of the bed as carefully as I could; I didn’t want to wake him up. I got dressed and walked down to the big dining hall where breakfast was being served.
I ate yogurt with cereals, quite a lot, but it didn’t really satisfy my needs. I tried to figure out what I really needed. Something sweet and delicious, though not candy. Blood? Not really.
The feeling of not knowing had never been my favorite, but I had—almost—always had someone there to tell me. Well, at least after some whining from my side.
But right now there was no one by my side to tell me what exactly I wanted. Needed. Craved.
Correction: what my body craved. I didn’t really feel this longing for something, whatever it was. Why couldn’t I figure out what it was? I sighed and decided to do what I really didn’t want to do; give up.
The day was lying ahead of me. My plan was to try to get a job, or at least it had been when I’d woken up this morning. Now I didn’t know for sure anymore. Just like Jacob had said yesterday, where could we get a job?
My thoughts examined different kinds of professions that maybe I could handle.
A family with two small girls in kindergarten-age came into the dining hall. The girls immediately ran over to the small playground in one of the corners of the hall.
I picked up a newspaper and started stirring my tea. A perfect human mask. I didn’t pay any attention to the words in the paper, instead I listened carefully to what the parents were saying.
“Did you hear what Amanda said to Viola this morning?” the woman asked her husband.
“I’m not sure, tell me.” The couple had one of the best accents in the world: British. Sometimes I wished I was from England…
“I miss Emma, don’t you?” the woman said with a childish voice.
“Emma…?”
“Their kindergarten teacher,” she said with a sigh filled with movement.
The man buttered a sandwich while he spoke. “Oh, right. Yes, I remember her now. She missed her?”
His wife smiled at him and nodded. They moved towards a table and called for the girls.
So they missed their teacher. Suddenly a lightning struck me. I could be a teacher. Or a kindergarten teacher. I hurried out of the hotel, dumping the dirty dishes on the table.
The cold rain hit my face as I walked quickly through the streets of Vancouver. The air was chilly, cold for late September. I shivered slightly.
So, where was I supposed to go? Where could I find a kindergarten? They were not pointed out on any maps, so how would I possibly find one? I decided to just walk through the city to see if I could find anything.
I had only walked for about 10 minutes when I discovered my solution: a telephone booth. Those were rare these days, which probably meant I was pretty lucky. I crossed the road, opened the glass door to the booth and picked up the telephone book.
Wow. I was amazed by its existence.
I turned the first page and found the register. I flipped through the old pages until I found the business section.
“H...I...J...K,” I mumbled to myself. My finger searched for Kindergarten, and finally I found it. There were a few different ones, but I was too lazy to remember the addresses. Instead I just tore the page out and put it in my pocket. I was just about to leave the booth when I got an idea. If I called Carlisle from here, no one would recognize the number.
I turned to the phone, swiped my card and dialed Carlisle’s number. He picked up after two tones.
“Dr Cullen,” he said formally.
“Hey, it’s me, Renesmee,” I said quietly.
“Don’t worry, he’s not here.” Good. Then Carlisle could speak without effort.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. So, Vancouver, huh?”
“Um, yes. I guess so.” Jacob must have told him while I was lost yesterday.
“Listen, I’m not really sure about how we should do this.”
“Me neither. What do you want do do?”
“Actually, I would like to visit you. I guess moving you back here is not an option.”
“No, it’s not. The thing is, I’m not really sure of what we’re going to do here. I think we’ll need to get an apartment.”
“That might be a good idea, yes.”
“And in order to do that we must get a job, right?”
“Well, actually not—”
“I’m not accepting any alms from you, Carlisle. At least not a whole apartment.”
He sighed. “Okay. Do you have any ideas for a job then?” He seemed annoyed, though he was trying to hide it.
“As a matter of fact I do. At least for myself.”
This, apparently, enlightened his mood. “Let’s hear it.”
I thought twice for a moment. Was it really a good idea for me to be a teacher? Would I be able to pull it off? Would I fail? Would the kids just sit and scream at me? Would I, as a pregnant woman, even be able to get a job, or would they just kick me out?
Carlisle noticed my hesitation. “Renesmee?”
“Yeah, um...A kindergarten teacher…”
“That’s a great idea, Nessie! I think you would make a perfect teacher.”
I coughed lightly. “I guess so.”
“But hey, how about this? I’ll come up and visit you this Thursday? Then you’ve got two days to...plan some more, okay?”
“Sure, sure,” I said. I would find a job. I would.
“Take care, and you know it’s just to call me whenever you need.”
“Thank you. Bye.”
“Bye.”
I hung up. Sigh. At least Dad wouldn’t know about this. And that was good.
I picked up the addresses from my pocket. I would have to ask someone for the directions to find these places. I went out into the chilly air. It had started raining, and I actually smiled at it. It made me feel more at home. I closed my eyes and let my head fall back. The water was cool against my face, and I really enjoyed it.
That’s when someone poked my shoulder. The woman cleared her throat. “Excuse me, are you Renesmee Black?”

Jacob Black
We sat in a restaurant I couldn’t remember the name of. It was quite dark in the salon, but bright enough to see each other. We had just eaten our main courses, and were now waiting for the desserts.
“I’m just wondering, but how long are we planning to stay here?” Renesmee asked me.
“What do you mean?”
She looked confused. “It’s just that, well, I mean...we can’t live in a hotel all the time right? Plus, I don’t know how long our savings will last.”
The waitress came with our desserts. “Here you go,” she said and put the plates on our table.
“Thank you,” Renesmee and I both said, and then smiled at each other.
I waited for the blonde woman to leave until I opened my mouth again. “You mean you think we should go back? To La Push?”
“No. No! Not at all.”
“Then what do you mean?”
“I just think maybe we should find some place to live, and then get a job or something.” She grabbed the spoon in her right hand and took some ice cream. She didn’t look up.
“Well, I like the idea, but seriously, where could we get a job?”
“It doesn’t have to be permanent,” she murmured into the table.
I was just about to tell her that I didn’t understand what she meant when she froze. She stared at me in horror, holding her breath. Her eyes were so wide opened, they started to look more like golfballs than eyes. Finally, she let her eyelids drop in concentration.
“Renesmee?” Did I say something wrong? I asked myself.
She hadn’t moved an inch. The only movement she made was opening her eyes again and blinking, but the time between the blinks was very long.
“Wanna go?” I mouthed as I picked up my wallet. I took her continued staring as a yes and put the money on the table. I stood up, walked around the table, took her left hand in my right and turned for the door. I saw her eyes flickering to the opposite corner of the salon. Since I held her hand, I could feel whatever she felt.
The scent that was on her mind was delicious. Indescribable. Unbearable. Too much. It was everything beautiful in the entire universe. Very appealing. Extremely appealing. I had to focus every part of my mind on not killing the young woman. But it was hard. I slipped a few times and thought about ways to allure her with me. I blinked and refocused. Slipped back, blinked and refocused. It was like trying to climb a switchback; when you were just about to raise your hands in victory, you fell back down again. Blinked and refocused. Slipped back, blinked and refocused…
A dark-skinned hand came into my view. It opened the door. I took the small step over the threshold, and waited for the door to close.
It closed.
I was free.
I let go of her hand. “Renesmee, breathe! It’s safe out here, you can breathe now.” The experience she’d just shared with me was growing on my mind. I remembered Bella telling me about something similar to this. She had smelled so...indescribable — I winced at the thought — to Edward that he’d thought about killing her. He’d just wanted to drink her blood, that leech. I believed she’d mentioned an Italian phrase as well, but I couldn’t remember it at the moment.
Renesmee’s expression didn’t change, but slowly, very gently, she took a sip of air. She could hold her breath for a very long time, but not forever like her parents. She sighed, and the tension in her body disappeared a teeny, tiny bit. A human wouldn’t notice.
“You okay? Is the air cleaner out here?”
She looked up at me and blinked in approval. Her breathing was almost back to normal.
“Come, let’s go,” I said quietly and put my arm around her waist. I almost had to drag her with me; her legs would not cooperate.
Our hotel was only two blocks away, so we were there quite soon. We took the elevator up to the fourth floor, where our room was. Neither of us said a word. We didn’t have to; we understood each other anyway.
We went to bed immediately, without brushing our teeth or anything like that. I pulled her closer to me. “My baby,” I murmured into her hair, and then I realized that my words were easily misunderstood. She started trembling in my arms. I lifted my hand and pulled a tear away from her cheek. She put her fingers lightly around my neck. I’m scared. And she really was; everything about her mind was focused on fear.
“I know, I know.” I played with her ringlets. I didn’t want to admit it, but I was scared as well. Scared to death.
What did Carlisle say? she thought.
I went through my memory to remember the conversation. “He said, quote, ‛you have to hunt’. I told him we were just about to leave, and then he said he would call back tomorrow.”
She sighed. Nothing else?
“No.”
Good.
I pressed my lips to her forehead, and she leaned closer to me. “Sweet dreams,” she whispered.
“Sweet dreams.”
She was snoring after five seconds. How could she be so tired? It didn’t make sense. But then I remembered that she was pregnant, and I’d heard pregnancy made you tired.
Wow. A baby. I was going to be a father.
I fell into unconsciousness as well.

Her silver-blond hair was the first thing that caught my attention. Then her pale skin, her beauty, and finally her dark, red eyes.
“Irina,” I gasped. I remembered he from my childhood, or whatever you should call it. First the time when we’d been hunting, Mom, Jake and I, and second the time with the...Volturi. I wondered if she still had something against the werewolves, or if she had gotten over that prejudice.
Jacob growled deeply at her.
I walked towards him and put on my friendly facial mask. “Hi, Irina! I didn’t expect to see you here.”
She smiled an obvious fake smile and shifted her weight to the other foot. I pondered about why she did; she didn’t really have to as a vampire.
“Renesmee…” she looked at me “Jacob.” She nodded at him.
He growled back.
“Jacob, behave will you?” I didn’t really feel like being polite either, but maybe Irina had changed after all, who knew?
“What are you two doing here? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean to be impolite—” sure, you don’t “—I’m just curious.”
“We’re on vacation,” I answered rapidly; I didn’t want her to suspect anything.
“Really? How pleasant,” she muttered.
Did she see the bump on my stomach? I didn’t know. I hoped she wouldn’t.
“And you? Looking for new hunting grounds?” I tried to sound interested, but I don’t think I managed that well.
“On vacation.” Her smile never fainted.
Shoot, we were busted.
“Oh, you too? Do you still live up in Alaska?” The smile was truly unpleasant now. It reminded me of someone…
“No, I don’t.”
I was surprised by her answer, and I believe I saw Jacob flinch beside me.
“Okay, so where do you live?” I deeply hoped that those red eyes were just a rare coincidence.
“In Italy.”
“With the V-Volturi?” I stammered.
She nodded, still smiling.
Jane. Her smile was inspired by Jane’s. I didn’t know what to say. I was out of words. Though I felt like I had to come up with something. “Vacation, you said?” I ogled at her.
She kept her voice calm. “I come in peace. I was just on my way back to Volterra.”
The way she pronounced Volterra surprised me. Her voice got filled with respect and esteem. It was quite scary.
I swallowed. “Well, I hope you enjoyed your staying. I haven’t heard from Tanya in a while, how are they doing up there?”
“They are fine, thank you.”
“Okay, good.”
My stomach rumbled again. I chuckled half-heartedly. “Well, we were actually on our way—”
“Did you gain weight?” Her red eyes had moved from my face to my stomach. She was ignoring my Jacob.
“Excuse me?! What kind of question—”
”Or are you pregnant?”
“I’m not going to answer any of your questions!” She had offended and insulted me quite strongly.
She snorted. “Tell Carlisle I said hi, will you? I’m actually in a hurry here.”
Jacob growled at her. She didn’t wait for my reply. “Goodbye.”
And she was gone.I didn’t bother to look after her; what was the point? I couldn’t stop her now, anyway. I stared at the ground instead.
Jacob wouldn’t stop growling.
I tried to remember the conversation with Irina. I wanted to draw some conclusions, try to elucidate the future.
I counted on the fact that she understood that I was pregnant, and not overweight. She would now go back to the Volturi and tell them about her detection. She would probably tell them about our location as well, that we weren’t in Forks or La Push anymore.
The Volturi would be left with two options. Either they would come here and kill us all, or they wouldn’t. At least I didn’t see any other alternatives.
I doubted the second choice. The Volturi did not miss a chance to fight with the Cullens. Though I hoped that they wouldn’t come here; I wasn’t suicidal.
But what if they actually would come here? Would we run? Would we fight? I didn’t know.
I hoped for their absence.
My stomach rumbled once more. I put my right hand in Jake’s fur. Maybe we should get going? Will you please phase back?
He took one step backwards and phased. I held his eyes. This was not the right time to talk. Jacob must have drawn the same conclusion as I had.
As soon as he’d put his shorts back on, I took his hand and started walking. He caressed my hand, but he didn’t say anything. I guess there was nothing to say.
“No,” he murmured. “There is not.”
I wanted to keep my mind off certain things, and so I looked at the trees very carefully. I analyzed every single detail. I saw patterns between the roots and the leaves, created figures out of them, just the way you did with clouds. There was a chair, a puppy, a sun and a...pacifier. Sigh.
I saw Jacob looking at me out of the corner of my eye, thoughI didn’t meet his gaze. He put his arm around my shoulders instead. I leaned into him and took in his musky wolf-scent. My favorite scent. I jumped up and kissed him on the cheek, then giggled and put my arms around his waist.
He stopped and turned towards me. His hands found my face. He gently caressed my cheeks and looked straight into my eyes. Very gently.
I put my hands around his waist and pulled him closer. He didn’t have a t-shirt on. I wondered where he’d left it. But I didn’t  really care. I moved my hands to his chest. He was warm, and his breathing sped up. The left corner of his mouth twitched.
I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t know what to say.
The twilight played on his face. He was beautiful. “Thank you,” he mouthed.
“You’re welcome,” I whispered and looked down, I didn’t know why. Jacob lifted my chin up with two of his fingers. He held my gaze once more.
My lips opened, and I stood on my toes in an attempt to reach his. He chuckled and bent down instead.
His kiss was more careful than what it had been before. Not even our first real kiss had been this...gentle.    It was like he was scared of hurting me. Well, I guess that was okay. Maybe even good.
Yes, definitely good.
My hands were in his hair. He hadn’t cut it for a while now. I liked that. His lips moved from mine to the hollow below my ear.
My breathing did not slow down. He put his arms around me. “Renesmee,” he breathed. “We will make this. Together. Everything will be all right. Don’t worry.” He held me tighter. “Don’t worry,” he repeated and buried his face in my hair.
For a moment I forgot both place and time. I had no idea where we were, it I could be either New York or the Arctic. It didn’t matter. All I knew was Jacob. All I felt was Jacob. All I heard was Jacob.
And I loved it.
But then my stomach ruined the moment once more. We both chuckled this time.
“Maybe we should get back,” we both said in unison, and then we laughed in harmony. Ebony and Ivory. So different, but still similar. Just like...but I didn’t want to think about them.
We walked hand in hand towards what I thought was the end of the forest.

I sat in one of the chairs on the balcony. The sun was burning my face, and I wondered if I could get a tan. It had been quite hard getting a tan in La Push, so I didn’t even know if it was possible for me. Well, maybe not at this time of the day...
Jacob sat in the other chair. It looked like he was sleeping, but I wasn’t sure. I could only be certain when he was snoring, which he wasn’t right now.
A strange noise came from my stomach. Jacob opened one eye slightly, and then he sighed and smiled. “Sorry, we should get something to eat, right?”
I hadn’t thought of that until he mentioned it, but yes, I was very hungry. And as I thought about food, I realized I was thirsty too.
My eyes widened, and my mouth fell open. There was a very strong scent from somewhere near us, below I thought.
“Renesmee. No.” His voice was distinct and firm.
But all I could think about was the fire in my throat. It was unbearable. I couldn’t stand it. Though there was still a part of me that wanted food. Real food. Unfortunately that part was too small.
A low hiss came from my lips. And then I was inside.
“Renesmee. No,” Jacob said again.
There was a buzzing sound from my purse.
“Don’t breathe,” he ordered. He didn’t take his eyes from me as he took the phone in his hand. “It’s Carlisle. Do you want me to answer?”
I hadn’t moved a muscle since he told me not to breathe. It seemed like I didn’t move now either, but the phone was in my hand. I held it there for three seconds, long as years.
I put the phone slowly to my ear, but I didn’t say anything. I didn’t breathe.
“Renesmee?” he asked on the other side.
I squealed and took a deep breath.
Pain.
Fire.
Flames.
“Hhh...” I breathed. My eyes were bulging.
“Renesmee, you have to hold your breath!” Jacob reminded me.
“Renesmee, could you give the phone to Jacob?” Carlisle ordered calmly.
Jacob heard and grabbed the phone out of my hand, which was left behind at my ear.
“Carlisle?” He took my hand that still was at my ear and caressed it.
I probably could have heard their conversation, but I didn’t listen. I had to focus on gaining control of myself. I didn’t even hear what Jacob said.
I didn’t know how I got there, but after a few minutes or so we were in a forest.
“Can I breathe now?” I mouthed.
He put his hands on my shoulders and studied my face carefully, like he was waiting for my wild reaction. “Yes. Careful...”
I closed my eyes. My hand were at my sides, clenched into fists. I inhaled slowly.
“Are you okay?” Jake whispered.
I felt like screaming. This just wasn’t fair. “Where are we?” My voice was almost inaudible.
“In a forest.” He smiled wryly.
I nodded. “Can I scream?”
“What?”
“How deep is the forest?” I have to scream.”
“It depends on how loud—”
I screamed. Loudly. Jacob winced.
My screaming became more of a howl, all mixed up with pain, fear and tears.
My knees couldn’t take it. I fell softly to the ground. I didn’t stop screaming. Or howling, whatever it was I did.
Jacob lifted me up and embraced me tightly. I swung my legs around him. My scream was not much of a scream anymore, the sobs took over.
“Nessie, Nessie...” He stroke my hair.
I was confused. I wouldn’t tell Jacob about my dream, I just couldn’t do that. But on the other hand, he thought I was just scared of myself and a baby. And that wasn’t exactly the truth.
“Nessie, you need to hunt,” Jake whispered in my ear.
Since I already had my hands around his neck, I decided to ask him about the phone call. I showed him a picture of Carlisle.
“I’ll tell you later. You need to get some blood. Now”
I groaned, but I also searched the air for any scents. My nostrils flared, and I put my feet back on the ground.
Jacob let go of me. “Go. I’ll come right after you.”
I followed the delicious scent until I saw a stream of light through the trees.
There it was. A full-grown deer, standing right beside the brightness.
I walked closer in a circle, moving soundlessly behind the trees. The deer was feeding on grass. The fire was burning in my throat. I swallowed once, and then I attacked the creature’s neck.
The warmth of the blood made me want even more of it. And the taste. It was like I’d never tasted anything like it, though I knew I had.
As I fed, I heard a crack, and I immediately turned around and growled.
“Woah, Jake! Don’t scare me like that!”
He tilted his head to one side, as if to say I’m sorry.
“Apology accepted. Just don’t do it again.” I turned back to the lifeless animal in my hands. “Whatever, it’s dead already,” I sighed. Then my stomach reminded me of how I’d figured out I was thirsty in the first place. The sound was very odd; I grimaced at it.
I thought about Jacob. He had just shifted, so it felt quite pointless to make him shift back and get some real food at once. At least that was what I thought. I wondered if Sam was telling Jacob anything. I didn’t know what he would want to talk about at the moment,  but since I didn’t know what else to say I figured I might as well ask. “Did you hear anything from Sam?”
Jacob shook his head slightly. So Sam wasn’t wolf right now, then. Good. They hadn’t noticed that we were gone yet.
“Okay. Maybe we should get back...” I proposed.
Jake shifted. “Maybe we should,” he said as he put his sweats back on. “Or we could just go to a restaurant,” he offered.
I thought about that for a moment. “Did you have any special restaurant in mind?” I grinned.
“I don’t know. I just thought that since we are in a big city—or a city at all—maybe we could do something different. Plus I think it’s a little difficult to cook in the hotel room...”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. So, you never answered my question.”
“What question?”
“About the size of the forest.” I smiled.
“Oh, that question. Well, I mean, it’s pretty big—”
“What direction?” I asked eagerly; I wanted to race him.
“The hotel?”
I nodded, probably a little too excited.
He pointed out the direction.
I grinned. “Last one there’s a human!” I took off through the trees. The wind was blowing in my hair, and I really enjoyed that feeling. I thought I could hear Jacob behind me, but I wasn’t sure.
I sped up; I couldn’t lose my own bet. My breathing was even, just as usual. The forest didn’t have quite the same scent as the one around Forks and La Push. This was still musky, but a somewhat drier version of musky. I would almost say a little sweeter. Yes, definitely sweeter. I thought I recognized it a little.
Nah, I was probably thinking about it too much. I listened after Jacob instead. Strange, I could only hear my own footsteps. Until I heard him growl.
I stopped immediately and turned around to see what he was growling at.
That’s when I saw her for the third time.

”Vancouver?” I shouted in surprise. ”I thought we said Seattle!”
”We were in Seattle, and then we flew here,” he tried to calm me. ”You slept like a rock, and I didn’t want to wake you up.”
Wow, I must have been driving on the road in the desert for a very long time. I decided I didn’t want to tell Jacob about that dream. He would freak out.
”But how?” I started.
”I carried you,” he said and smiled wryly.
”But how did we get through the security?” Don’t you have to show some signs of life to get through?
”We’re here now, and that’s what matters, right?”
”Right. Thanks.”
”No problem.”
I looked around the room. The walls were of some color between yellow and beige. It reminded me of something I didn’t want to think about.
I sat in a couch with flower patterns. Ugly, I thought. In front of me was a table with a flower on it. On the wall to my right was a painting of flowers. Behind the table was a flat-screen TV on a small desk.
There was a wall-to-wall carpet on the floor. It was dust gray. Ugly, too.
I turned to see what was behind me. The first thing I noticed was the bedspread. It had a flower pattern.
”What’s with all of these flowers?” I asked.
Jacob just laughed.
I chuckled. ”I mean, it’s really ugly.”
He laughed even harder.
Behind the bed was a panoramic window and a glass door that led to a balcony. My very impression of the room was that it was very small, and it looked like the furniture had been pushed inside.
Beside the TV was a door, and to my left was another one.
”Where are we anyway?” I asked, still sleepy.
”I told you, remember? Vancouver.” He sat down beside me and stroke my cheek.
”Yes but where in Vancouver?”
He smiled secretly. ”What do I get for it?” His teeth showed behind his lips; he enjoyed this.
”Hey!” I complained and punched his stomach. He laughed at me.
”That’s not fair!”
”So what do I get?”
”You know I could just go out that door and see.”
He took a firm grip around me. ”Really? You can? Good luck with getting inside again, if you get out that is.” He was so smug I wanted to hit him, but I couldn’t since he held me so tight.
I growled.
He continued laughing. ”What do I get, huh? What?”
I knew that if I didn’t say anything soon he would start tickling me, and I couldn’t handle that. ”Kiss?”
”I guess that’s fair enough.” He leaned in and closed his eyes.
”But I want to know where we are first”
He groaned.
I laughed. ”Fine.”
I kissed him. Long. He kissed me back.
He was just beginning to lower his hands when I stopped. He growled playfully and was just about to tickle me, but I caught his hands before he got so far.
”Now it’s your turn to answer my question.”
He laughed at my expression. ”Guess.”
”I don’t know, a hotel?”
”You’re smarter than you think. Or maybe more stupid than you think, since you gave up although you knew the answer.” He seemed pleased with his conclusion.
”What if I just wanted to kiss you?”
”Then feel free to do it again.”
Now I was the one to laugh at his expression.
”What?”
”You should have seen your face!” I just couldn’t stop laughing at his lips and eyebrows being curved exactly the same way. ”I think I should invent a camera that is placed in your head, so that you can take a picture anytime you’d like. Smart huh?”
”Very. Just one question. How were you planning to get the pictures out of your head?”
I laughed even harder than before. ”So you don’t think it’s a problem to get the camera into your head?”
”No,” he said smugly.
”Why not?”
”Because I have a photographic memory.”
”Ah, I see! Smart! Then we’ll just have to invent the wire from the brain to the computer. Great!”
”Or maybe bluetooth.”
We both laughed at our crazy conversation. Then we didn’t say anything for a while. As we sat there in the sofa, staring at each other’s faces, I started thinking about my dream. I was careful not to touch Jake with my hands; I really didn’t want him to know about it. Or at least what I thought of it.
The two babies had been very beautiful, and they had looked similar, though still not similar at all. I couldn’t remember right now, but somehow I’d known it had been a boy and a girl. I guess I knew it in the dream-way; you always knew things in dreams, though you couldn’t explain them later.
I tried to clear out the vision of the two babies. The girl had been dark-skinned, though not African. Kind of like Jacob. Actually, when I thought about it, she looked a lot like him. The cheekbones were exactly the same. But her eyes. They were golden, like topaz. And in the next second, they were red.
A vampire’s eyes.
I moved on to the boy. His skin was anything but dark. It was pale like snow. And I recognized his face, too. It looked a lot like the girl’s but more like...me.
I winced. The boy was the one who had called my name, and I remembered looking into his eyes as well. His eyes had been brown like Jacob’s.
I gasped as I understood.
”Hey, what are you thinking?” Jacob asked me quietly.
What was I supposed to tell him? ”Nothing.” Okay, that gave me more time to think.
He took my chin in his big, warm hand and forced me to meet his gaze. ”You know I don’t like it when you lie. Because I can see that you are.” Just like my mother, I was a terrible liar. At least when I lied to Jacob.
”I just thought of a nightmare I had a few nights ago. It was a mistake to bring it up to myself.” At least there was something true in that sentence.
”Want to talk about it?”
”Nope. Absolutely not.”
”Okay.”
I rose and went over to the glass-door. I opened it and went outside to the balcony.
There was a light breeze, and I stretched my arms. There was an afternoon-light over the city and I started to wonder what time it actually was. I took a look on my left wrist, but then I realized I had forgot my watch on the kitchen table; I had pulled it off during our dramatic dinner.
”Damn,” I muttered to myself.
”What’s wrong?” Jacob asked from one and a half step behind me. This shouldn’t have startled me, but it did.
”Forgot my watch at home,” I told him.
”I’m sure you can manage without. I never wear one.”
”Maybe because it’s just a liability for you.” I wasn’t sure how close our nearest balcony-neighbors were, so I tried to avoid mythological words, like werewolf for instance.
He chuckled at my statement. ”You really need to know the time?”
I nodded.
”Don’t move,” he told me. Three seconds later he was back again. ”Ten to five.”
”Ten to five?!” I really wasn’t prepared for that. ”Whoa!”
”What did you expect?” He smiled at my reaction.
I sighed. ”I don’t know. Just...nah, I don’t know.”
He took my hands, and I intertwined his fingers with mine.
Thank you, I thought.
He smiled, bent his neck, and kissed my nose.
Thank you, I thought again.
He continued smiling.

Renesmee Cullen

”What?”
”We’re leaving.”
”Where? Why―”
”I don’t know, and I don’t care. Away from here, at least.”
I sat down on the couch in shock. ”Can’t we just talk about this?” I asked him.
”No.” He picked out a suitcase and went into our bedroom.
I went after him. ”Why not?”
"We don’t have time.” He was throwing clothes into the bag.
”Is there a bomb or what?”
”Almost...”
I sat down on the bed instead, legs crossed.
”So what, we’re just leaving everyone without their knowledge?”
”Yes.” His voice was strained.
”Just let me tell Carlisle.”
”No.”
That was it. I had to tell Carlisle, or else I wasn’t going to move an inch. I was going to beg for it; I didn’t want Jacob to leave without me, and he seemed pretty determined to go. ”Please, Jacob, please. It’s all I’m asking.”
He sighed and went into the bathroom. ”Just him, then. Hurry up. We will leave in ten minutes.”
I frowned and lay down on the bed. I took the phone out of my pocket and called Carlisle.
He answered almost immediately. ”Hello?”
”Hey, it’s me.”
”Hi! How are you feeling?”
”I don’t have time. Make sure no one can hear me.”
”Closing the door to my office...now.”
”Thank you.”
He spoke more quietly this time. ”What’s wrong?”
”I don’t know why or where, but we’re leaving.”
I counted to seven seconds before he answered again. ”Okay...”
”But I have to pack now.”
”Will you call me?”
”No. Don’t tell anyone about this call.”
”Okay―”
”And call me tomorrow instead. Then I will know more.”
”But Mark―”
”Thank you. Bye”
”Okay. I see. See you soon.”
I hung up and took a deep breath.
”Renesmee!” He truly was in a hurry, wasn’t he?
”Can I have a suitcase, too?” I asked.
”I already packed your clothes.” He was in the kitchen now.
”Oh, okay. Thank you.” I grabbed my purse and stuffed it with my most important belongings, such as money, passport, phone. And photos. I hid them in a pocket; I didn’t want Jacob to know about them.
I didn’t know when we were coming back, if we ever were. I took a quick look around the room to see if I had forgotten anything. A lamp, some dirty socks on the floor and, in the corner, my guitar.
I had never played it.
”Nessie, you comin’?” Jake shouted from the living room.
”Yeah. Did you take my necessities, too?”
”Yes.”
”Just give me one minute.”
He sighed loudly, just for the sigh.
I sighed at his sigh. Now he was the one who wasn’t fair. I walked into the bathroom and checked the cabinets.
I looked out the door to see if Jacob was there, but he was still in the living room. I grabbed a box of tampons and threw them into my purse. I didn't know why I did. Was there a possibility that this was just a dream? I didn't think so, and I didn't know whether or not I wanted it to be.
On my way out to the car I picked up my book. Wuthering Heights, the title said.
I got this strange feeling; that this was the end. Not the end of life, but the end of chapter. End of story.
A honk interrupted my thoughts and I walked outside, switching off the lights as I went. I locked the door and walked to the car. I sat down in the passenger seat. ”Jake...” I said as I turned my head towards him. I gasped when I saw his expression.
A tear fell down his cheek. He looked straight forward, hands on the wheel.
I scooted over to him and pressed myself against his body. It took a lot to make Jacob cry, so I knew something was very, very wrong. I wiped the tear out and hugged him. ”What happened? Tell me.”
”It doesn’t matter―” he said through his teeth.
”Yes it does.”
He did not move.
”Then why are we here?”
”He’s such a―” He interrupted himself.
”What? Bitch? I think he is.”
”You don’t know...”
I waited. ”What?” I whispered. ”What is it that I don’t know?”
He moved one hand from the wheel to the key.
I stopped him. ”Jake, you’re in pain. I can see that. I’m not an idiot.”
”Didn’t say you were.”
”Then just tell me,” I begged. ”Please?”
He folded his hands and leaned back. His eyes were closed. ”That bloo―man―has never said anything nice to me. Not a single time what I can remember.”
”Though you don’t know what he’s said about you.” I tried to ignore the fact that Jake probably hadn’t said anything nice to Dad either. I was at Jacob’s side in this conversation, in this subject.
”What?”
Did he really have to ask me that? That was not necessary. Or maybe it was, whatever...
I ignored his question, too. ”Then why do you still live here? In La Push, I mean.”
”I’m...don’t...why...” he stammered.
I turned towards him and sat in his lap.
He threw his arms around me and hugged me almost too hard.
I did the same. I caught his scent and kissed his neck, and continued towards his lips.
He kissed me back.
I put my hands in his hair, and he did the same with mine.
Then he lowered his hands to the bottom of my sweater. He caressed my skin and I pressed myself closer to him.
I unzipped his hoodie and touched his bare chest.
He pulled me closer. We never stopped kissing.
Until he remembered why we were in the car, and pulled away.
I groaned, just as he’d done whenever I had refused him before.
That thing―okay, I had to stop calling him or her that―made me want him even more. It wasn’t fair, at least I didn’t think it was.
I sat down on my regular spot beside him and sighed heavily.
Both of us sat and caught our breaths for about one minute. Recovering...
”So, where to?” I finally asked.
”I was thinking maybe we could start out with Seattle, and then perhaps somewhere else.”
”Sounds good,” I mumbled and yawned.
The steady sound of the engine made me tired, and I cuddled up by Jacob’s side.
He lay one arm around me and kissed my head. ”I love you,” he whispered.
”Good,” I said and smiled. I thought he smiled too. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.
I dreamt of a long road in the desert. I was driving in a jeep, and I had this feeling that I had to hurry, a feeling you only had in dreams. It was really hot, though the heat didn’t affect me. I drove and drove, but I never reached my goal.
Suddenly I stopped because there was something in my way. It was a baby carriage. I went out and towards it.
In it was two babies.
”Renesmee,” one of them whispered.
I winced.
”Renesmee, you have to wake up. We’re here,” Jacob whispered in my ear.
I opened my eyes and blinked at the sudden brightness. I realized I wasn’t in the car anymore. ”Where are we?” I had beed in Seattle before, but I did not recognize this place.
”Welcome to Vancouver,” he greeted me quietly.

Jacob Black
We held hands as we walked back around the house. Renesmee hummed quietly at a song I didn’t recognize. But I liked the melody, well, at least as much as I could hear of it.
I had almost forgotten about Seth, but he was still standing here, waiting just as everyone else. Though he was still a wolf.
Alice looked confused, and almost a little mad.
“Having trouble with the future?” I teased.
She snarled.
“Oops, sorry.”
“Jake…” Nessie warned me.
I smiled at Alice, and I realized Emmett was smiling at something, too. Though I doubted he was smiling at Alice. He was probably just enjoying the moment of a possible fight.
Edward frowned at me. But then he glared at Bella instead; she must have used her little power on me, or everyone.
I smiled again.
Renesmee let go of my hand and walked with long strides towards her father. “I will not slap your face, because I know it won’t hurt you. But seriously, Dad, what is your problem?”
I swallowed a chuckle; this wasn’t funny for Renesmee.
He moved his stare to me. To her stomach. Back to me.
“Yeah, what is your problem? I mean, I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t really know why we’re here,” Emmett confessed.
I bit down another chuckle.
“You haven’t figured out yet?” Jasper asked, surprised.
In the corner of my eye I saw Seth’s ears turn forward.
“Er, no?”
Edward ignored them. “You’re taking my daughter! Don’t I have a right to be mad?”
“No, you don’t!”
He grimaced.
“Hey, listen! You did the same to me!” I yelled.
“Do you really think we should take this conversation here?”
You’re right, it’s inappropriate. Blink if you can hear me.
He blinked.
You took Bella from me.
“Don’t you think it’s a little late to think about that now?” He turned to look at Renesmee. “No.” He turned back to me and raised one eyebrow.
She waited 24 years, and this is what she gets? She did that for you.
“I didn’t know.”
No, you didn’t. I waited. No answer. But that doesn’t change things, right?
“No, it doesn’t.”
Go to hell.
“A few years ago, I would have said yes, please, but now I’m just gonna say you too!”
“I still don’t get it…” Emmett said in a low voice to Jasper.
Jasper explained.
“Oh. Oh! Congratulations Nessie!” He ran forward and hugged her.
Bella sighed. “Emmett, you’re such a jerk.”
“Oh.” He looked down. ”Right, I get it. Please don’t kill each other.”
If Seth had been human, he would have laughed.
I think it’s best if you leave now, I thought.
Without a word, Edward turned towards the woods. Everyone followed him, except Seth and Bella.
Renesmee dragged Bella into the house.
I just looked at Seth. I was disappointed at him. I could have managed that on my own. I shook my head at him.
His head fell, ears backwards, tail down. I couldn’t stand his pain, so I punched his shoulder lightly.
Now he was the one too shake his head.
I went back to the front door. I met Bella halfway to the porch.
Her smile was apologetically. “Bye, Jacob.”
She hadn’t developed mind reading, too, had she?
I hoped not.
I closed the door carefully after me, and I knew Bella couldn’t hear us. Then I turned to Renesmee and said the final words. “That’s it. We’re leaving. Now.”

Renesmee Cullen

What were they doing? Were they serious? Fighting about me again? Really mature…

Mom and I ran in the woods. We had been on our way to whatever she was showing me when we’d heard a wolf howl. And then another.

“Maybe we should get back and check if something’s wrong,” Mom had suggested.

“Yeah,” I had replied. And so we had gone back to the house. I had just gotten a glimpse of Alice, leaping into the trees. Mom had run inside, checking with Carlisle if he had known anything. And he had.

Apparently, Dad had heard the news and now he’d wanted to kill Jacob. Carlisle hadn’t even finished the sentence before I was on my way.

According to that, we were now running through the forest on our way home to La Push. I heard someone howl, though not a wolf this time.

That was when I saw them through the trees. It was sort of a spectacular scene; to the left was Seth, holding Jacob in his place, both in wolf-form, in the center was Alice, staring at Jake, and to the right was Jasper and Emmett, holding Edward down. Every vampire in this scene turned to look at us. Jacob and Seth noticed and turned, too.

I scowled at Dad as we stepped onto the courtyard. I felt a wave of calmness, and I knew it was Jasper. Who else...

Alice had returned to stare at Jacob. I went forward, towards him. I put my hands in his fur. We need to talk. Now while they’re here.

He sighed.

“Dad, what is he thinking? Don’t edit!” I ordered him. He remained silent.

“Dad!”

“Edward—“ Mom began.

He interrupted her, teeth clenched. “He wants Renesmee to come with him around the house.”

Jacob growled deeply.

“You edited! You can’t—“

“Renesmee just go,” Alice murmured.

“Fine,” I pushed. I couldn’t really be angry—Jasper was still here—but I tried my hardest.

 

“Renesmee, I’m sorry.”

I just kept on glaring at him.

“I’m so sorry.” It almost sounded like he was apologizing to himself. He took me in his arms. “I’m so sorry,” he repeated. “I’m so sorry, Renesmee, I’m sorry.”

I tried to remember what I’d wanted to tell him, but I couldn’t. I was too upset and angry and disappointed and I don’t know how many feelings I felt at the moment. I just couldn’t. I decided to start with another question, but I knew it wasn’t exactly what I wanted to know. “What happened?”

“Your Dad came here,” he began.

“Oh, really? Wow, I would never have guessed!”

“Oh, Nessie, please! Come on! Grow up!”

“I’m the one who should grow up? Since when?”

“Oh, please! You’re so naive.”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

Shit! Not again! I turned to a bush and puked.

“Aw, fuck,” I pressed.

“Hey,” Jacob started again. “I’m sorry.”

“You mentioned that, yes.”

“Listen to me. I. Am. Sorry.”

Man, this wasn’t fair. A tear fell down my cheek. Jacob lifted me up and put me in his lap. He stroked my hair with a gentle hand. “You wanted to tell me something?”

“I forgot about what,” I sobbed. True.

He looked right into my eyes. “You sure?”

I put my hands to his cheeks. Yes, I’m sure I forgot. I smiled wryly and touched his face. I brushed his forehead, his eyes—he’d closed them—his jaw line, his chin, his lips and finally, his hair. My lips barely touched his, but then he turned slightly an kissed my cheek instead.

“You probably don’t taste that well…”

Thanks a lot, I thought.

He chuckled and kissed my neck. “I love you.”

I sighed and pulled away. “I love you, too.”

“Guys, I don’t mean to interrupt your little intimate moment here, but the fact is that we’re still waiting for you,” Emmett announced.

“Dang,” Jacob muttered under his breath.

“Yeah…” I smiled wryly again. “Let’s go.”

He sighed. “Emmett, will you give us a minute?”

“Sure, But don’t forget us again. Please?”

“Sure, sure,” Jacob replied.

Emmett left and I stood up and took Jacob’s hand in mine. “Will you stay human?”

“I’ll try. You know I will.”

“Thank you. And if you don’t have anything nice to say, then just shut up, will you?” You too, Dad…

He laughed at my thought. “Sure, sure.”

I grinned. “Sure, sure.”

He kissed me lightly, on my mouth this time.

Jacob Black
I picked up the phone from the kitchen counter. I dialed Renesmee’s number. Four tones.
“Hi, Jacob! I was just about to call you,” my angel said.
“Yeah, I guess I was faster…” I said sourly.
“Hey, I’m so sorry. I haven’t been fair to you lately.”
“No, you haven’t.”
“I’ll do whatever you want! I’m not really asking you to forgive me, but could you at least try not to be a pain in the ass? Please?”
“Sure, sure.” I’ll do my best.
“So, what do you want me to do?”
I guess I forgot about that offering. But I knew exactly what I wanted her to do. “Come home.”
She sighed. I sighed.
“About that,” she started. “Mom wanted to show me something.”
“Okay…”
“And don’t ask me what it is, because I don’t even know yet!”
“Fine. But you will come home tomorrow. Promise me that.”
“Of course. I miss you. A lot.”
“Yeah, I miss you, too.”
She didn’t say anything. I tried to think of a new subject.
I believe I managed pretty well.
“You told me Bella was going to show you something.” I heard her inhale, as if to speak. “Wait! I’m not asking you about what she’s going to show you. Did you tell her?”
“Oh. Um, yes.”
“How did she react?”
“Better than I thought.”
I laughed. “Yeah, Bella always surprises you, doesn’t she?”
“Yes,” she said, and I could hear her grin.
“It was a rhetorical question.”
“Yeah, I know.” She chuckled.
I wasn’t sure if I really wanted an answer to the following question, but I asked her anyway. “Does Edward know?”
She sighed slowly. “Yes.”
“Who told him?”
“Carlisle thought him.”
“Oh, right.”
We were being experts on awkward silence, but someone had to break it eventually. That someone was me.
“How did he react?”
“I don’t know, I didn’t want to see that.”
“It’s not like he’ll kill you,” I said in an attempt to be funny. It didn’t work that well, since we both knew Edward Cullen hadn’t won the “Mood-Control Olympics”.
“He doesn’t speak to me. He doesn’t even meet my gaze.”
“He will have to get used to it.”
“Thank you,” she said. Then we both went quiet; someone was knocking on out front door. She heard that and greeted me quickly. “Love you!”
“Love you. Both of you.” I could hear her giggle as she hung up.
“Coming!” I said as I put the phone on the table. I walked to the door and put my hand on the doorknob.
I opened the door, and immediately closed it again. But he was faster, he’d put a foot between the door and the threshold.
“What do you want?” A tremble came down my spine, and continued towards my arms.
He scowled at me.
I opened the door a little further. “What do you want?” I repeated.
“What did you do to her?”
“What—“
“I think you know perfectly well what I mean, Jacob.”
The hell I do, filthy bloodsucker!
“Dog,” he said. I pushed him outside. So, this was the final fight…
“You bet!” he snarled.
I’m in for it! I phased. So, how come you decide to put up a fight today? I mean, you’ve had reasons before, haven’t you?
“Actually, I’m sort of doing this for you,” he said.
Hmm, good excuse, huh?
“It’s the truth.”
Yeah, right…
“I know what you feel like,” he said after a while.
What? No you don’t! I love her, and whatever she’s carrying!
“Hmm, why did I even try to be compassionate?” he murmured to himself.
Wait, what?!
He just stood there and stared at the ground. I got a little impatient and took a step forward.
Mistake.
He growled as he pushed me away.
I growled, too. Is that all you can do, bloodsucker?
Jake, what the hell?! I heard a voice say in my head.
Seth, stay out of this!
Edward froze.
No, you guys need to grow up! What are you fighting about this time? Ice-cream?
Not funny, Seth.
I’m not trying to be funny! I’m surprised you haven’t noticed yet; you fight about everything. Why can’t you just…
I tuned him out and looked at my enemy instead. He hadn’t moved an inch. Was he being scared of Seth?
I took my chance.
I threw myself on him. He didn’t react, but somehow I was pushed away.
Seth, this is between the two of us!
I wont let you! Think about this, please!
There is nothing to think about—
Renesmee? Bella? Me?
Just piss off…
Suddenly, Edward stood snarling at me. But in the next second, there was a crash, and he wasn’t there anymore. I looked around, trying to find his hiding place.
Instead of finding him, I saw a tiny, pale silhouette glowering at me and Seth.
Mostly me, though.
“Will you please explain to me why my brother’s future recently disappeared?” the silhouette accused.
Talking to a wolf, smart girl. She could have just asked her brother…
“Oh, wait. Dogs can’t talk,” she said, smug, just as if she’d heard my thoughts. I wanted to see if she felt threatened, so I took one step towards her.
Dang, she didn’t move!
“No!” I heard Edward yell. He reacted pretty slow…
“Jasper, calm him down,” Alice said, still looking at me.
I understood that it was the tiny leech’s partner who had moved Edward.
Hey, let’s get out of here, Seth thought.
Leave if you want to. I’m staying.
If you stay, I stay. I don’t leave without you.
Seth—
Don’t Seth me!
I ignored him. I hadn’t noticed that all of the vampires’ eyes were focused on something in the woods. I slowly turned my head.

Jacob held my hand during the whole test. He looked a little scared, and sort of happy, when Carlisle said that everything seemed all right. Carlisle also said that we’d probably ought to make a new test every week, since I was half-human-half vampire, and Jacob was a werewolf. He and the pack banned everyone who mentioned shape-shifter, and so I called him werewolf.
What a funny child! Third-human-third-vampire-third-werewolf… I wondered what it must feel like to be your own enemy. Would my child be a Smeagol/Gollum?
No. No, no, no. Schizophrenia and whatever this was could not be the same thing!
It wasn’t, I decided.
I asked Jacob to leave for a moment; I wanted to talk with Carlisle. He went out to the car, wary. Carlisle looked at me with concerned eyes.
“Is it really as good as it looks?” I asked when I knew Jacob couldn’t hear.
He sighed. “I don’t know. But if this would be a human child—which I doubt this is—everything would have looked great. So don’t worry.”
I didn’t really listen to what he said. I just looked right into his golden eyes. He opened his mouth, as if to say something, but I was faster.
“What am I going to say to Mom?” I didn’t have time to think of another way to put that.
“I think the best way is to just tell her. She’ll find out eventually anyway.”
“Dad’s gonna kill me…” I murmured.
“No, he is not. I can talk to him, if you’d like?”
No! No way! “Um…”
“Or you can do it yourself.”
Okay, so I’d rather have Carlisle “telling” Dad than me doing it.
“Fine, but could you at least wait until, like, I don’t know, next week?” Dang, my voice broke.
“Tomorrow, or you will do it yourself.”
I clenched my teeth. “Fine.”

I smashed the door shut and put my hands on the wheel. Then I couldn’t hold it in any longer. The tears ran down my cheeks. Jacob took me in his arms. I sat in his lap, crying like I’d never done before in his presence. He didn’t say anything, he just comforted me by being there, stroking my back.
I hadn’t noticed it was dark until I heard my phone ringing. I tried to ignore it, but Jake took it out of my pocket.
“Hi, Bella, it’s Jacob,” he answered it and gave me a meaningful eye. I groaned. He listened to what she said. And then he handed me the phone.
“Renesmee Carlie Cullen, where are you?”
I started the engine. “I’m on my way. Where do I meet you?”
“The big house.”
I cut her off. I switched on the radio and pressed the accelerator.
“Can you turn up the volume?”
He pushed the button three times.
“Louder…”
“Nessie—“
“Just do it! I don’t want to think!” And I didn’t. I didn’t think. I just sang, or maybe shouted, along with the songs. I didn’t want Dad to hear my thoughts.
As soon as we got to the house, I flew inside. “Mom!”
She was there in the third of a second. “Let’s go outside.” She dragged me with her. I was very thankful to the fact that she understood that I didn’t want Dad here.
We hunted in silence. I caught a few foxes, my favorite. But I couldn’t keep this inside anymore.
And neither could she.
“Renesmee, what’s wrong?”
I took a deep breath. “Mom, please don’t kill me…” I whispered.
“Hon’, why in the world would I want to kill you?”
“I’m pregnant.” There, I said it.
“What?! You’re pregnant?”
Oh, no. Oh no, no, no! Don’t kill me! Please don’t…
She stared at me for two and a half seconds. It felt like years.
“Come here,” she said and embraced me. “Why would I want to kill you?”
I ignored her question. Mom, I’m scared.
“Yes, I know.”
That’s not very comforting. Just so you know.
She chuckled. “Sorry.”
We started walking back towards the house. Mom held my hand; she really knew how to comfort me.
We talked about my day. About the test, that everything looked good. We talked about her theories. She had actually thought of pregnancy earlier, but she’d thought it was impossible. Not literally impossible, though, but she just couldn’t believe it.
We also talked about her becoming a grandmother at the age of 43. Sort of…
She never mentioned Jake or Dad, and neither did I. I was just beginning to relax a bit when we saw the opening in the forest.

”The hospital?” he said, almost accusing.
I glowered at him.
”I thought you didn’t want—”
”Yeah, well now I do,” I said, a little too much rage in my voice. He looked out the window and I sighed. How would I put this in a good way? ”Jake, you have to help me,” I whispered as I turned onto the one-oh-one. He took my hand and turned towards me. I felt weird, dizzy. I was looking for something, though I didn’t know what.
”What’s wrong?”
I wasn’t really sure if he was asking about what I said or what I did — but I was focused on something else...
No. This wasn’t happening. Not again. I stopped the car and ran outside.
And then I threw up.
”Ew,” I heard myself say. Ew, ew, ew! ”You got a napkin or something?” I coughed. I heard the dry leaves on the ground rustle as he walked to a tree.
”Er, I hope this is okay...” He handed me a few leaves.
”Thanks,” I managed to say, and sat down on the wet road. For once I was glad we lived here. The rain would take away the smell. Not that many people wandered along the one-oh-one.
Jacob sat down beside be and stroke my back. I breathed heavily. I thought this was the time to... negotiate?
”What am I going to say to Mom?”
”Well, I am not an expert on planning difficult conversations—”
”Please, Jacob. Please help me.”
”I don’t know how!”
”You must have one idea, at least.”
”I’m not sure...”
I tried to be sneaky. ”Tell me something.”
”What?”
”How did Mom tell you about me?” Mohaha, it worked!
”That’s not my story to tell...”
Bastard! Are you trying to keep the truth from me?! ”Oh, I believe it is.”
”Why don’t you just ask Bella?”
You’re not just a liar, you’re stupid too. I glared at him. ”I sort of asked her yesterday, but she didn’t exactly answer my question.”
”What did she tell you?”
”That’s not my story to tell,” I hissed and repeated Jacob's earlier statement.
”Oh, come on!”
”Fine. She told me her ‘story’” I could feel him stiffen beside me.
”Okay...”
”But she stopped at the part where she got pregnant.”
”Oh...”
I waited for him to say something else. But he didn’t.
”So I was kind of thinking that you might tell me more about that.”
”I don’t know—”
”Or do you thing I should ask Rosalie?” I tried to sound really sarcastic, and I succeeded. But, obviously, that didn’t help a lot.
”That is a great idea.” He rose. ”Feeling better?”
”Depends...” I hurried to the driver’s seat and started the engine. There was a moment of silence, but then my phone rang. At first I thought I’d just let it ring, I had the feeling it was Dad. But I figured it might have been Carlisle, too.
I picked it up from my pocket. Carlisle calling, the screen said.
”Renesmee Cullen,” I answered it.
”Hey, it’s Carlisle. Where are you?”
”I’m on my way. Had to stop for a moment...” Such a wonderful moment.
”Okay, I see. Just wanted to make sure you were all right.”
”I’m fine. Meet you in five.”
”Bye.”
I hung up. I tried to stop the panic in my stomach, but it wasn’t easy.
”She showed me.”
What?!
”What?”
”Bella showed me she was pregnant.”
”How?”
”Well, Nessie, you see, when a woman is pregnant, her stomach gets kinda huge.”
”Do you think I’m retarded?!” I didn’t mean to sound so angry, but I couldn’t help it.
He chuckled. ”Calm down. She showed me her stomach.”
I thought about that for a moment. I glanced down at my stomach. No, it’s not big enough, my inner voice told me. But I had promised Mom to tell her what was wrong.
I didn’t have more time to think about that, we were already at the hospital. I opened the door to the car and walked slowly outside, staring at my feet. Suddenly there was another pair of shoes on the ground. I took a deep breath, and looked up to meet his eyes. My Jacob. He looked like he was trying to compose his face, but I knew he must have been more scared than I was. I took his hand in mine and smiled.
I love you, I thought as we started walking out of the rain and into the warmth of the hospital, though the temperature didn’t really matter.
He gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

I drove quickly down to La Push, not really paying any attention to the road. I thought about how I would explain this to Mom. Not to mention Dad...
I could just tell her right away. I’m pregnant. Don’t ask. And then just leave without meeting her gaze. But I realized I would have to answer her questions and accusations eventually anyway. I was such a coward! Option A was out.
I could lie. Say something like: We just had a little fight, and Jake overreacted. It’s okay, nothing to worry about.
Why didn’t you just tell me? She would ask.
I didn’t want any questions...
That would probably work perfect with any other human being. But I knew Bella Cullen too well to even try to lie. Sooner or later, she would catch me with a big, fat lie. Literally. Option B was out, too.
Witch left me with only one option, C.
Option C was quite embarrassing. It was to ask Jacob what the hell I was going to do. I decided as I stopped the car by our house; I would talk to Jacob on our way to the hospital.
I opened the door. ”Jake! Jacob Black?”
”In a minute!” He was in the kitchen. Our house wasn’t big at all. Two rooms and a kitchen. And bathroom, thankfully...
The bedroom contained one queen-sized bed, two closets and a mirror. Alice didn’t really approve the one-closet-each-thing. But then, it wasn’t her business. I had a few clothes back at Mom and Dad’s place. Jacob didn’t need that many clothes. I smiled at the thought.
I lay down on the couch and picked up my copy of Wuthering Heights. Mom had insisted on me reading it. So far I liked it. A little slow, but still my kind of book. Catherine’s pathetic with all her crying, but I like Heathcliff. I feel like we have something in common, me and him. We’re both a bit different...
I put it back on the table. I knew it wasn’t good for me to think about what I was.
I started to look around the room instead. The front door was at the eastern side of the house. It led to the living room, where I was at the moment. When you got in you almost crashed into our little TV, but if you held left you would crash into the fireplace instead.
In front of the TV was the couch, one armchair and a little table. There was a bookshelf, too. Poor thing didn’t get that much attention.
The kitchen was nothing special, just a very rectangular room, filled with furniture that would remind you of a...kitchen.
I chuckled at myself. Of course it looked like a kitchen, stupid!
”What?” asked the sweetest voice in the entire universe.
I stood up, taking his hand while I rushed for the door.
”Where’s the fire?”
”I’ll explain on the way. Just come.” We got into the car, and I immediately put the key in the ignition and turned it.
”Hang on,” Jacob said. He took my face between his hands. ”Where are we going?”
I put my hands around his neck. To the hospital, I thought.
He looked confused.
Carlisle knows. And probably Alice, too.
Jacob sighed and bent in to kiss me. His lips was soft against mine, moving vividly.
I exhaled and shifted the clutch. ”Here we go,” I said, hoping that I didn’t sound as freaked out as I was.

Suddenly the sun peeked through my window.
“Is Dad here?” I asked.
“Yes. I can ask him to leave if you want?”
“No, that’s fine.” I got up and looked at myself in the mirror. A big mistake. I knew I was beautiful, but right now I couldn’t think of anything else than my tomato-red cheeks and my hair that looked like a haystack. I groaned.
I picked up my comb and a hair ribbon.  In five seconds I was beautiful again.
“Will you tell me what’s wrong?”
“Tonight,” I said without thinking.
“Promise?”
No? I sighed. “Mm…”
She gave me the “yes-or-no?” eye.
I sighed once more. “Yes! Okay. Promise.” I realized I had lifted my hands in a gesture that reminded of what you’d do if a police caught you, stealing something or driving too fast.
“Thank you.”
I thought about what Mom had told me that night. About her life. Of course I knew Jacob and Mom had been in love, but I didn’t know how complicated things had been. Though she did stop at her and Dad’s wedding. Maybe just because she knew I was tired, but I thought there must have been another reason. Something she didn’t want me to know. Something about me…
I still wanted to talk with Carlisle, so I thought Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle during the whole breakfast.
I didn’t hear a word from the living room. Mom must have been “telling” Dad about the night. Great.
I got up to the big house as soon as I could, and knocked on Carlisle’s door.
“Come on in, Renesmee.” I opened the door.
“What can I do for you today?” he asked.
“A lot…” I murmured. He looked questioning at me.
“First of all, I have to ask you not to thing about the following conversation.”
“I understand.” He smiled shyly. Thank you, Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle…
“Do you have any post-its?”
“Sure,” he said and opened a drawer in his desk.
“Thank you,” I said as he handed me the post-its and a pen. I began writing, holding my hand up as a wall.
“And this secret is safe with you?”
“Of course!”
I showed him the post-it.

I’m late

He took a deep breath and grabbed the pen and the post-its. Then he wrote with his perfect writing.

How long?

I wrote quickly.

>2 weeks

In my head, I counted to 100 and back in Latin.

How do you feel?

Weird, threw up yesterday

Jacob knows?

Sort of

He looked at me. I looked at him.

Do you want to make a test?

I thought about that for a moment, though I didn’t stop counting. I wanted to make a test, I really did. But that would be so obvious. Unless…
I nodded.

At the hospital, alone.

Just as I finished the last word, nausea was attacking me. I bet Carlisle saw that because suddenly there was a dustbin in my hands.
Gross.
Carlisle handed me a box with paper-napkins.
“Thanks,” I managed to say. He started squeezing my stomach. Then he took the pen and wrote.

No doubt you’re pregnant.

I glared at him. Then someone knocked the door. Esme, I thought.
“Hold on,” Carlisle told her.

Still wanna go to the hospital?

As soon as possible.

“Please enter, Esme.”
She stepped inside. “Is everyone all right?” Esme asked, considering as always.
“Everyone is fine, just fine,” Carlisle answered her. “I’m going to the hospital, Dr Tremor Called.”
“Okay.” She smiled and turned to leave.
“Could you get Alice for me?” I asked her.
“Sure.” Esme smiled and left this time. I began writing again.

I’ll meet you at the hospital.

You sure?

Of course not, Carlisle. How could you think anything else? I continued writing quickly.

Jake.

Then Alice came inside. She looked a bit suspicious. Carlisle eyed me and left us.
“Please, sit,” I asked Alice. She hesitated for a while, but then she sat down anyway.
“Did you, like, get any weird visions lately?” I whispered.
“Nah, just Carlisle doing a pregnancy test at the hospital.”
I put my hand at her cheek.
This stays with you, I ordered. She gasped, eyes wide with shock. I glared at her. Her eyes were pointed at me, though she was somewhere else. I saw the clock in the corner of my eye.
“I have to go. Promise.” She nodded, eyes still far away. I wondered what she saw, but I didn’t dwell on it. Instead I turned towards the door and started walking.
“Renesmee, wait!”
Alice gave me a note with something written on it.

Where will you be?

I took the pen out of her hand.

La Push. Don’t call. Thanks.

I tried to smile and left the office.

I ran through the forest. Dad, leave. Dad, leave. Dad, leave! I slowed down a little when I saw the house, or should I say cottage? Leave, leave, leave. And don’t ask.
He went outside, looked at me for a brief moment, and ran away, towards the big house. Blue, blue, blue, blue.
I opened the front door.  My room, room, room, room, room. Mom came after me. I lay down in my bed, and she lay at my side.
Silence. She new just how to make me feel better.
“Shh, it’s okay. Everything is okay.” The tears gushed down my face.
“Can you tell me something?”
“What? Do you have anything in mind?”
“No, nothing in particular.”
“Okay. There’s actually something I would like you to know.”
I waited for her to continue.
“You know I haven’t lived here in Forks like this all the time,” she started.
I thought about my very first memory, Mom as human.
“I lived in Phoenix at first, with Renée and Phil. But when I was seventeen I moved here, to live with Charlie.
“First day at school was horrible. I met this weird, but beautiful guy. We were lab partners in Biology, but the following week or so, he was gone.”
“Dad, right?”
“Yup. Anyway, my friends and me went on a trip to La Push First Beach. That’s when I met Jacob for the first time. He told me some quileute legends. Soon after that, I understood what Edward and his siblings were.”
“Vampires?”
“Yes. Then it all began.”
“What?”
“I’m about to tell you. Be patient.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
“Anyway, Edward and I fell in love—“
“Aw…”
“Stop interrupting me!”
I chuckled. “’Kay.”
"I had this dream, to become like him. But he didn’t want that to happen. So they left Forks.”
I knew this; that Dad had left.
“I was depressed for months. But then I met Jacob again. We hung out almost every day. Until the fever set in.
He told me to remember what he’d said at the beach, when we’d first met. After a while I realized what he was, a werewolf.
“We became friends again, but not entirely like before. He wasn’t the same.”
“Get to the point…”
“Sorry. Got caught up by the moment…”
“’S okay.”
“Right. Anyway, I jumped off a cliff—“
“You did what?”
“I went cliff diving. No big deal.”
“Yeah, right…”
“No. But Alice thought I was dead, and Rose told Edward. So he went to the Volturi—“ I winced at my memories of the black robes, “—but I’m not going to give you nightmares by telling you that story.
“Anyhow, they got back to Forks. But Jake and I were better friends than what Edward approved. Plus, Jake’s feelings for me were of a different kind than mine were for him.
“Buy now Edward had promised me to change me. He would do it himself on one condition. I would have to marry him.”
“And you did,” I commented.
“Not exactly. Later. Just let me talk.”
“You don’t really like it when I interrupt, do you?”
“Not at all.”
I smiled.
“When Jake found out about our marriage he was mad and disappointed. So he left. He left La Push. We didn’t know where he was, not even Sam knew.
“But we didn’t let that stop out plans. The wedding was beautiful, you should have been there.”
“Do you have any pictures?”
“Sure, I’ll show you sometime.”
She didn’t say anything for a while.
“That’s it? End of story?”
“Oh, right. Forgot. Sorry.
“At the party, we got visit from a very close friend.”
“Jacob!”
“Yes. You have no idea how glad I was.”
“I can imagine.”
She sighed.
“Where was your honeymoon?” I could ask that, right?
“You will find out eventually,” she said, smug.
“Hey! That’s not fair!”
“Actually, it is. I didn’t know until we were there.”
“Haha, okay.” I chuckled. But then I remembered why I was here, and started to cry again.
“My little baby,” Mom whispered and took me in her arms.
I cried myself to sleep that night.

I stared at myself in the mirror. No way! I only wore underwear, I had just woken up. Jake was out with the pack. I turned to look at my profile.

It is hard, trying to deny the impossible truth. Two weeks had gone. I had never been late before. Never! Not a single day.

Two weeks.

My eyes scanned my body. Evidently, my face was green. At least it felt green. I dashed into the toilet.

Oh, no! Throwing up was not a good sign. I went into the kitchen and filled a glass of water. As I drank it, I realized I had to see Carlisle. Tomorrow. Maybe...

I kept on thinking like that the whole day. Jacob came home about 3 pm. He reminded me of the fact that Sam, Emily, and their two sons Adam and Leonard, was going to have dinner with us. Luckily, I hadn’t forgotten.

I’d taken a shower just before he got home, and I was beginning to cook. I was a very good chef, I had to admit. Tonight I was making pork chop with an apple-sauce and potatoes.

The Uleys came over at seven. Dinner was just ready, and I asked Jacob to lay the table.

”Smells great.” he said as he entered the kitchen.

”Thank you,” I said and looked down in the floor, a little embarrassed. Emotions had attacked me all day, and I figured it must be the... thing.

”Hey, is there something wrong?” Jake said, taking my face in his hands.

Everything’s wrong! I almost thought.

”No.”

He looked right into my eyes, doubting. ”You sure about that? Nothing wrong at all?”

”Yes and no,” I answered both of his questions. He kissed my forehead and put his arm around my waist. He held me close to him as he led me to the living room.

”Dinner’s ready,” I said to our guests. Emily was the one to react first.

”Do you have any special seating in mind?” she asked politely.

”No, we’re not that formal,” I answered her. Jake was talking to Sam, I didn’t bother to listen.

”Then I’ll sit next to you, I think.”

”Sure,” I said and smiled. Thank you, Emily! Jake sat down at my other side. He took my hand instead. I held it tight; I needed him close to me.

Leo was the younger of the two boys; he recently turned thirteen. He didn’t say that much; filled with hormones, obviously. He sat down across from Emily. Next to him was Adam.

Adam was fifteen, almost sixteen. He hadn’t got the ”fever” yet, though it was just a matter of time. So far he was acting very nice to everybody.

Sam sat next to Adam, opposite Jacob.

”Enjoy!” I said when everyone was seated.

The food was appreciated, and nothing was left over. We had a really good time, almost crying with laughter sometimes. Everyone but Leo. After about an hour he asked Emily if he could go home.

”Leo...” Emily said. He sighed and looked out the window.

”It’s okay,” I whispered to Emily. She sighed, too.

”Fine.”

”Keys?”

”Under the flowers—”

”As usual...” He left with heavy steps, and his head was hanging down like a dead flower.

”Please excuse him. He just broke up with his girlfriend,” Sam said.

”Oh, of course,” I said. The conversations moved on. Emily and I talked about a movie we had seen last week. It was a comedy, and it was really funny. We still laughed at some parts.

I really enjoyed myself as the hours passed by. I ended up in Jacob’s arms, cuddling a little.

But suddenly, totally out of the blue, the nice atmosphere was destroyed by a question from Sam.

”So, have you guys thought about marriage and children yet?”

Awkward silence. Luckily I already held Jacob’s hand. Please, Jake, say something!

”No, we haven’t talked about that yet...” I let go of his hand.

Fuck! I did not like swearing at all, but it felt like I didn’t have a choice.

Jake put his arm around me, so that his hand was placed at the middle of my stomach.

Adam started talking about his school-project instead. My eyes were probably screaming Thank you, Adam!

Then, with the perfect timing, the incomprehensible happened. The thing turned! Or maybe it moved, whatever. With Jake’s hand on it!

Jacob had just begun to relax, when he froze. I couldn’t even feel him breathing.

FUCK! This wasn’t happening!

”Renesmee,” he breathed into my ear. I swallowed. "What. Was. That?” I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t even notice that everything was quiet. I ran outside.

”Nessie!” Jake shouted and ran after me.

”I don’t know...” I murmured to myself.

”What was that?” he repeated. ”Is it what I think it is?”

I sat down by my favorite tree. But Jacob wouldn’t let me. He dragged me up to my feet again. It was like I was somewhere else. Jacob was standing in front of me, talking to me. I even think he was shaking me.

I didn’t react. His voice was far away, and so were my thoughts. I had to see Carlisle. Now.

I came back to reality.

”...made a test? Are you sure? How long...?

”Shh!” He looked at me. ”One question at a time,” I ordered. He swallowed and scrubbed his face with his hands.

”Renesmee, are you pregnant?” he said between his hands.

”I don’t know.” Almost true...

”So you haven’t made a test?”

”No.” True.

He nodded once. ”Do you want to?”

”What? Make a test?”

He nodded again. I shook my head.

”Okay,” he said. I thought the interrogation was over, but apparently, it wasn’t. ”For how long have you known?”

”I said I didn’t know—”

”How long, Nessie?” He glared at me.

”I’ve been late for two weeks,” I almost said. He heard me.

”Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, pleading now.

”I don’t know...” He made me feel embarrassed. I guess it was fair enough.

”You don’t know...” he chuckled.

”No,” I murmured. ”I love you.” He turned to look at the house, and I took my chance.

I ran. Away from Jacob, away from the house, away from our guests. Away from the questions.

”Renesmee!” I heard him call after me. I was afraid he’d follow, but I did not turn around.

Since I didn’t know where Dad was, I had to keep my thoughts away from him. Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle...

When I got to the big house, I took a quick look in the window. My cheeks was striped with tears.

I opened the front door. ”Carlisle?” I called quietly. Rosalie came down the stairs.

”He and Esme are out, hunting. Is there something wrong?” I ignored her question.

”When will he be back?” I didn’t care about Esme right now.

”Tomorrow, I think.”

”Thank you, Rose,” I said and turned.

”No problem...”

I decided to text Jacob. I knew it was cowardly done, but I couldn’t talk to him yet.

 

I’m sorry. Sleeping at Mom and Dad’s tonight. Please forgive me.

 

After a half minute, I got reply.

 

I love you. You’re forgiven. I understand.

 

I replied a short message, too.

 

I love you too. Thank you.